til this day, it frustrates me to know that you go about life as if you only have one child. i'm sorry i can't give you grandchildren or you seem not to enjoy my company the way you enjoy my sister's. i'm sorry if i seem as an embarrassment because of the way i look. however, i do not want to live my life the way you live yours: a life full of hate. i'm sorry that you treat my husband differently than you do my sister's. i'm sorry that things are awkward and/or silent when i come around therefore i find it difficult to even want to visit you. i'm sorry that you have only stepped foot into my apartment to visit me ONCE just because i happened to live next to your godson which you actually intended to visit. i'm sorry that you buy my sister extravagant gifts for christmas and i only get a mere sweater. i'm sorry i would rather go without than to ask to you for a dime that you would hold over my head even though i NEVER ask you for anything. i'm sorry that you didn't bother to want to be there to help me pick out my prom dress and wedding dress. i'm sorry that you didn't bother to ask me if i needed anything when i got my first apartment but filled my sister's with everything she needed. i'm sorry that when i do manage to set aside my feelings and try to make plans to spend time with you, that you always decline my offer. i'm sorry that my grandmother, my uncle, and i can relate to how we feel about they way you treat us. i'm sorry that i don't even want to acknowledge you on holidays because my feelings get hurt each time. i'm sorry that there has been numerous times that you only thank my sister for holiday wishes even though i still brought myself to call you on those same holidays. i'm sorry that you always hurt my feelings after each facebook post claiming how proud you are of my sister but there are none about me. i'm sorry that the facebook posts of you acknowledging my birthday is only a sentence long versus the paragraph-long posts you put up about my sister's. i'm sorry that i blocked you on facebook to prevent me from having to feel this way. i'm sorry that i don't even have the energy to continue on about my feeling towards you but one thing i am NOT sorry for is for how i have come to terms that our relationship will just never be. i've learned a few things from all of this: i've learned to be proud of MYSELF. i've learned to have my OWN back, i've learned to do things on MY OWN. i've learned how to love, trust, and i let GOD handle what it is left to handle.
nonetheless, i still love you...
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